Charmaine’s Cancer Journey
Charmaine shares her struggle with oral cancer and how her support system became her rock. Read her story of hope and perseverance.
Charmaine // 30 Stories Campaign™ // Oral Cancer Awareness
The summer of 2009 marked the start of my cancer journey. I had a cyst in my mouth that I wanted to have checked out. It tested positive for cancer, so my doctor removed the cyst and prescribed six weeks of post-surgical radiation therapy. And so I went about living my life for a decade.
Then in May of 2021, I noticed a cyst-like structure had returned in my oral cavity. Worried that it might be a recurrence, I decided to get a biopsy just to know what was going on. The biopsy came back positive for cancer, but there was good news—it hadn’t metastasized. With this local recurrence of my cyst, I had it removed and went through a round of Proton radiation.
My husband has been my rock and my best advocate. He has stood by my side through thick and thin… [he] would just hold me until I could stand on my own two feet.
When I found out my cancer was back, my first thought was about my husband and our adult children. I never want them to worry about me or cause them any anxiety. My husband has been my rock and my best advocate. He has stood by my side through thick and thin. Whenever I would feel depressed or weepy, my husband would just hold me until I could stand on my own two feet. Our daughter, who lives nearby, was my other rock. She gave my husband and me unending, physical and emotional support. For me, that brought me the greatest comfort.
Get Screened
Detecting cancer early can increase your chances of survival and decrease the overall cost of treatment. Perform a self screening, find free screenings near you or make an appointment with your healthcare provider or your family dentist. Not many people realize that their dentist is trained to look out for signs of cancer in your mouth.
…trust somebody to stick with you through the journey. Let them be your advocate, to support you when you need it most.
Whether it be a spouse, a lifetime partner, your children or a best friend, trust somebody to stick with you through the journey. Let them be your advocate, to support you when you need it most. The people around you—your support system—are the most important.
You must also do your research, and find the most capable doctor available. My doctor and care team made me feel incredibly secure, safe and confident. I cannot express enough gratitude to my surgeons and radiation specialists who eradicated my cancer.
Despite being rid of the cancer, the radiation left me with some painful lasting effects. After the first time I went through radiation, my sense of taste disappeared and my mucus secretion was thick to the point of almost choking me. However, time and a lot of water brought my taste buds and mucus back to normal.
Caring for my family and friends when they needed me made me feel my strongest amidst my cancer journey… it helped me to heal myself.
After my second round of radiation, my hearing was affected in one ear and a jawbone was compromised and deteriorated. I also developed tongue ulcers that were extremely uncomfortable—like pressing your tongue on a hot iron. Lidocaine soothed the burning sensation from the ulcers and has helped them to slowly heal.
My doctor performed another operation to help heal my jawbone. All in all, it’s a small price to pay if the treatments I received get me to my 100th birthday celebrating with my loved ones!
Caring for my family and friends when they needed me made me feel my strongest amidst my cancer journey. If my daughter called to say she couldn’t come home from work in time to pick up her children from school, I stepped up to the plate and picked them up. It actually helped my healing process to be able to help my daughter. Nursing my husband back to health from Covid helped my healing process, too. Caring for others who needed me actually forced me to get moving. In doing so, it helped me to heal myself.
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My mom always said, ‘First do what’s necessary and then do what you want to do’ …none of us are guaranteed tomorrow.
My mom always said, “First do what’s necessary and then do what you want to do.” For me, that meant being there for my husband or children. I do things right away for my family and friends because there’s no time like the present. If my cancer journey has reinforced one thing, it’s that none of us are guaranteed tomorrow.
So because of that, I now go overboard to do things for others, helping them. Doing so makes you forget that you sometimes need help. It puts you in a better place—similar to how I felt when I would help my daughter or take care of my husband during my cancer.
You have to confront yourself and say ‘stand up!’ when you think of giving up …get yourself motivated to do the next thing, and so on.
Cancer definitely sucks. However, for me at least, the cancer journey has reminded me to reach out to people and respond when they call—I don’t hesitate when it comes to attending to my loved ones.
You have to confront yourself and say “stand up!” when you think of giving up. Force yourself to get up! Once you’re up, get yourself motivated to do the next thing, and so on. You have to remind yourself to pick yourself up when you feel low. Fake it til you make it—and you will!
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For someone recently diagnosed with cancer, reading the stories of other caregivers and survivors can inspire.
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